Listening is in itself such a simple act. We don’t have to advise, or coach or sound wise (what a relief). We just have to be willing to simply sit there and truly listen.

However to do it well is a great art and skill. It requires us to be fully present, to drop the mental chatter of our minds.

Indeed, as Rumi said:
"The quieter you become the more you are able to hear."

Being a good listener has been shown to; improve empathy, build mutual trust, demonstrate respect and diffuse conflict. It is impossible to create a healthy culture if we refuse to meet and listen.

As listeners we need to create a space inside ourselves, we need to let go of our own beliefs and opinions and instead sit with gentle wonder, curiosity and an open heart. In doing so we learn what it is to be someone else, to walk in another person’s shoes.

Thus, listening helps us to move closer. As we listen so we understand and as we understand so fear and judgement dissolves.

And then, in this beautiful place that Rumi referred to as ‘the field beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing’ we can finally sit together and reweave the world once more into wholeness.
 

At a Touch of Gentleness we often get comments about how we listen.

One gentleman said to a volunteer that he really liked how she listened because she, 'listened with full presence and no jusgement and that is a very rare thing these days'.

And another commented on how he and the volunteer had 'just met in that place where there are no words'.

If you want to practice improving your listening skills start by setting the intention to listen and then ask a friend a question.
It can be as simple as "tell me what’s going on for you in life right now?" and then … listen.